tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4537325088305666113.post8160855404123455676..comments2024-03-05T03:37:33.247-07:00Comments on A JOURNEY WORTH TAKING: Finding Self-Confidence in a Push-OverAnonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13882096399249594635noreply@blogger.comBlogger6125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4537325088305666113.post-65285396794401569082009-01-30T17:05:00.000-07:002009-01-30T17:05:00.000-07:00And sometimes we just have to go with the people w...And sometimes we just have to go with the people who are gifted at planning, not only because they like control, but because sometimes they are good at it. <BR/><BR/>Generally people often just follow the natural leaders, too. So even if I do speak up, well, I'm not a leader, I'm a passive type, and everyone else in a group will just tend to go with the leaders...and therefore not with my ideas. I have to be OK with that because it's just human nature. <BR/><BR/>But I do know all my life I have kept my mouth shut because I thought my opinions aren't important. I'm working on that.Erinhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01067954787472463337noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4537325088305666113.post-51657962006279978422009-01-30T09:56:00.000-07:002009-01-30T09:56:00.000-07:00You know, that is a good question Erin. I think yo...You know, that is a good question Erin. I think you have a good point. I feel like those who are the planners don't want to hear my ideas and I would feel like getting in their way... So yeah, I guess their is a fear of being rejected and not wanted... Also, I never said anything before this because I guess these problems have never been as noticeable as they are now, and I think I felt that if I said something, that I was dealing with people way out of my league ( people who strive to plan and control for others).Nicolehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/00043902043758568457noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4537325088305666113.post-30069925481219878182009-01-30T07:26:00.000-07:002009-01-30T07:26:00.000-07:00I'm curious, do you not speak up because it's too ...I'm curious, do you not speak up because it's too difficult to be assertive or because you think your ideas and opinions aren't as good or valuable as others?<BR/><BR/>Because I am just now beginning to realize that for much of my life, what I thought was unwillingness to be assertive was actually conditioning to believe I have bad ideas and wrong opinions. <BR/><BR/>I do think the two pair together...if I believe I have bad ideas I won't speak up because I fear being shot down...<BR/><BR/>Anyhow, it's just something I'm working to understand about myself. I'm glad you're sorting it out, too.Erinhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01067954787472463337noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4537325088305666113.post-58772571347251261832009-01-29T13:19:00.000-07:002009-01-29T13:19:00.000-07:00Go Nicky!! :)Go Nicky!! :)Manuelahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/00225303074990493529noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4537325088305666113.post-13292646405445595592009-01-29T11:02:00.000-07:002009-01-29T11:02:00.000-07:00Nicole,Ahh...you are not the only one who struggle...Nicole,<BR/>Ahh...you are not the only one who struggles with being a "push-over." Although I'm a RPO (Recovering Push-Over) and have made progress, I still, at times, allow others to trod over me, all in the spirit of trying to be "loving."<BR/><BR/>However, one thing that helps me understand this whole dynamic is this Truth: "True Friendship/Love does not demand anything in return."<BR/><BR/>As well, you touched on a great point. Usually, controlling or demanding behavior comes from a spirit of insecurity. As a RCF myself (Recovering Control Freak), I know that when I have the urge to say or do something in a controlling manner, it is because I am feeling insecure at those moments.<BR/><BR/>Great post, Nicole! As well, I really like that picture.<BR/><BR/>Blessings,<BR/>~Amy :)Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4537325088305666113.post-84525674016792709572009-01-29T04:28:00.000-07:002009-01-29T04:28:00.000-07:00People generally respect people who respect themse...People generally respect people who respect themselves...(I believe or have found).<BR/><BR/>I have found that it is usually how things are said - opening up room for more dialogue. It is more than okay to say no to things you really don't want to engage. (work is usually an exception - but then again that is why they pay you...but even here you can negotiate to a point...never really having final say...but then again you do have a choice...it is the door...which most of the time is not a great choice..<BR/><BR/>enough rambling on my part.Walking Churchhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07108948078929712054noreply@blogger.com