Wednesday, February 27, 2008

Freedom BEYOND Our Fears

Why does fear seem to be at the surface in every person’s life?

Fear lives in and through politics. That fear of who is going to be our new president in the next election. A Fear of having the ‘wrong’ person in office and taking control of this country and putting many lives in danger. A fear that lives in and among our households; a suspicion of a spouse cheating, a fear for our children’s safety in our public schools, and a fear of not being accepted by others. Fears of the unknown or losing a loved one, (a fear of death). Fear of losing a job, fear of not having enough money to pay the bills, or having enough to even feed your household. The list goes on and on. You know, I think fear is the the biggest force that motivates people into doing things that they aren’t otherwise, willing or wanting to do. There is also fear formed in our local congregations. A fear that drives pastor’s and leaders to manipulate and control others to ‘pay up’ and tithe, so they, the pastors and leaders of the congregations can feed their families. They use the threat of Hell and use ‘alter calls’ to bring people to a fearful God. Any so called sin, and every wrong doing imaginable to enable others to fall into fear of what will happen to them if they don’t confess their sins. Fear is a force that strives on hurting and destroying the hearts of people. For some, fear rides on the bases of their entire lives. It has a way of controlling our thoughts and sometimes even our actions.

I was listening to a pod-cast from Wayne Jacobsen and Brad Cummings on The God Journey called, Freedom From Fear. They have some awesome conversations about how fear manipulates our thoughts even on how we perceive God in our lives. Some see God as an angry God, who is waiting for anyone to slipup. A God who doesn’t see His people through loving eyes, and uses fear and judgments to push and manipulate people into following Him. Some actually believe that God is a conditional loving God, who only justifies His love on the good a person does compared to how much bad a person does, and how some think God sees people from a Superior position. Yes God is Superior to me, BUT he came to earth to show me that He has felt the same as I and loves me enough to die for me through everything He has gone through. God in fact, desires a relationship with me for no reason other than the reason that this fearless God who wants nothing more than to love ME, and wants to be my Daddy, and in that, He allows fear to have NO bases in my life. Yeah, I have moments that I am fearful of things; I am a person just like anyone else. However, knowing where I stand with Father I know and understand that Love conquers fear and therefore, fear has no ability to be in my life. It sure would like too, but it can’t because Father has won me through His undivided, and unconditional Love that will last for eternity, and that my friend, is Freedom.

Sunday, February 24, 2008

The Synopsis From My Viewpoint

Okay, I finished A New Earth, by Eckhart Tolle yesterday. To my surprise, I finished the book in one day. It has over 300 pages and by the time I got to the last couple of chapters, I was sick and tired of reading words. For one, I am not a HUGE reader, and second, I usually am not that intent in finishing a book in one sitting, but things that were talked about in the book intrigued me even though I found through reading the book that there were many things I completely disagreed with. However, I decided to fish out the things that were good and use them in and through my life where Father has intended, and throw out the rest.

In order to understand where this guy is coming from, I must be honest and share both, the good and uplifting things I saw and the stuff I don’t agree with.

The whole meaning and purpose of this book is to recognize ones conscious state and how one can become aware of the now, and the Presence, as he calls it, in order to be awakened and fully understand ones human BEING. In order to fully understand your consciousness, one must know the signs and be aware of how powerful the ego is.

The ego is what Eckhart calls, a powerful force that builds up through ones entire life. It is born in and through a person since childhood. Ego becomes more important than anything or anybody else. Ego takes control when one is unaware of the current moment, and becomes lost or trapped in thought. They are selfish thoughts that create scenarios of anything that seem to be ‘against’ the self (ego). Eckhart points out that the ego isn’t necessarily wrong or bad but it is unconscious. It is unaware of the current moment.

These are the things that the Ego feeds on: unhappiness, resentment, grief, (possessions, and anything that has material quality value), never is satisfied and always wanting more, fear, greed, jealousy, violence, anger, rage, the need to feel superior to all others, mistrust in everyone and everything, complaints, feeds on paranoia, sees only what it wants to see, lives for recognition of others, admiration, wants to be famous in all eyes, destroys any hope or opportunity for any genuine relationships, lives to be fake, never wants ‘problems’ to cease, a dysfunction of every sort.

These characteristics of ego will show its self when the opportunity arises. They won’t necessarily show themselves at the same time, but will when the time is right. In order to overcome this ego or control it, when it is so desperate to destroy ones life, is to understand how powerful it is and realize that it will go as far as you allow it to go, in order for ego to control and manipulate you to do what it wants. Once the ego is recognized for what it is, the answer to removing this controlling force and to break free from its powerful grip and to fight back for what is truly yours, your life. In order to control this, one must move beyond the ego into ones own true identity. This is where discernment comes in and separates what I believe to what the Author believes. Eckhart believes that in order to do this, one has to become God. One has to strive to have the appearance and approach to all things as God. It first seemed like he was saying God being in us will give us the power to become present in the moment and defeat the ego, but then he says this. “The ultimate truth of who you are is not I am this or I am that, but I AM.” After reading that one little sentence, I felt as though he stripped away every supportive meaning that this book had to offer in just that one sentence. Father bluntly and honestly says in scripture.

Jesus answered, “I am the way and the truth and the life. No one comes to the Father except through me.” John 14:6

I am starting to think that he purposely took the (I AM) out of what Father was saying, and to call us what Father calls Himself, (or maybe I am just reading to far into this.)

Eckhart uses many scripture references that proclaim what Jesus says, but neglects the true meanings behind what Jesus is actually saying. For example, he uses an example from the Gospels, yet in what Jesus says in this, Eckhart is doing and telling the reader the exact opposite. “And when Jesus said, ‘Deny thyself,’ what he meant was: Negate (and thus undo) the illusion of self. If the self-ego-were truly who I am, it would be absurd to “deny” it.” Eckhart basically took two words out what Jesus was saying and didn’t show the verse for what Jesus really meant by it.
Then Jesus said to his disciples, "If anyone would come after me, he must deny himself and take up his cross and follow me. Matthew 16:24 Jesus said, ‘Follow me’, deny yourself, take up your cross and follow me. Father means what he says, and Eckhart wholeheartedly denies it. One has to have a purpose in denying themselves. Using those two words in this book doesn’t even make sense. A person isn’t going to deny himself or herself anything unless they have a good reason to: that being to follow God and live for Him. At least that is the best reason I can think of!

Even though Eckhart believes that the “I AM”, as in (ME) takes precedence over God, which is a BIG, not okay, in my book, I find some of his information to be helpful in living for God. (Not to sound contradictable) but I find that he does make a good point in separating the ego from who a person is. I just want to look past the negative things that Eckhart proclaims as truth, not to allow it or accept it as truth, but rather, to be graceful and sensitive to what Father is showing me.

He examines that the ego isn’t a part of the person, but just a collective dysfunctional behavior, the insanity of the human mind, that wants nothing more than to destroy ones life. He notices that all humans have this because they are unaware of their consciousness and not familiar with their BEING. Eckhart expresses how important it is to find consciousness, and become aware of the awakening of the soul and thus live life in the awakening of ones consciousness, and to BE in the moment of every moment. I have found this information very helpful and gather that Father desires me to realize that if I become more aware of each moment I live in, that, through the sensitivity of the Holy Spirit, I will become more aware of realizing that I have a say in how I react and respond in situations where I would normally ride on my anger or whatever wants to take hold of me in those certain moments and any of those characteristics that selfishness feeds on to gain control and precedence in my life.

The reason why I finished this book was because I felt that Father was telling me to finish what I started, not just for the sake of ‘finishing’ this book, but to see how Father was going to use the good that is found in this book and use it in His truth and in His light!

If most of what I took from the book seemed to be nagative in a spiritually sense in how one percieves God, it was not my intention to make the "negative' seem bigger than the positive. However, the negative that was found seemed to build my perception of God and strengthened my identity in Father more as I wrote this.

I think the most important thing that I have grasped from this book is becoming more aware and more conscious in every present moment, and understanding that there is something happening in that moment, whether or not I am ‘conscious ‘ enough to realize it, and in every moment, Father is there, and is waiting for me to find him or recognize him in every moment in time. In and when I notice the Spirit, all Father wants is to lead me and guide me to Him. This isn’t saying that Father is a cop and He is watching my every moment or move just in case I slip, but His desire is for me, and in that, all I see is how much He loves me. I want to come alive and become awakened on a regular bases by Father and His Spirit. That is what I ache for, so that I may portray His beauty and truth in and through the way I live my life.

Friday, February 22, 2008

A New Earth

I was watching Oprah this afternoon and she was talking about this book, A New Earth, Awakening Your Life’s Purpose, by Eckhart Tolle. The title seems a little New Agie, but I guess that would be called, (judging the book by its cover). Has anyone heard about this book and what its about? Oprah was interviewing some people who have read it, and to me it sounds pretty uplifting. This guy was saying as he was reading it, that he noticed how negative he was being and realized he doesn’t have anything to be negative about. So others seem to like it and twice they mentioned certain scriptures from the bible, not that that makes it good or not, but I am just kind of curious. I may go check it out soon…

Thursday, February 21, 2008

Seeking His Face In What’s To Come!

The past couple of days my hubby made plans to go visit a friend who is about to be shipped to Iraq for his last mission as a marine. Jonathan made plans to meet up with two other friends and leaves tonight. Before the plans were complete, I found out that I had most of today off through Monday, which means I would have a lot of time to go and hang out with my Family while he went to see his friend. However, it couldn’t work because I already had prior commitments to baby-sit this weekend and couldn’t cancel. So, as was planned, Jonathan left this morning. Lets just say, I was a little flustered about not being able to go. Well, today, I got off of work at noon, and just as I was driving home, I got a phone call and my babysitting plans got cancelled due to some illness in the family. Well, I found this out about two hours after Jonathan left. We have another vehicle, but it’s a gas-guzzler and unpredictable. I was uncomfortable traveling for eight hours by myself, and I felt a nudge from Father to stay. At first, I was really upset because of barely missing a free long weekend back home with my family. After my anger subsided, I calmed down and figured Father had another plan for me this weekend. Still don’t know what He is going to do with me in these empty five days ahead of me. It kind of seems a little liberating not having a ‘plan’. By nature I am a planner and love to know what I am going to do and what is expected to happen, however, Father is taking that away from me I believe, and has a plan that I don’t need to know about until it is already underway. Maybe he will give me a little heads-up, but we shall see.

Father, let your will be known to me, and the time I have to be spent wisely in You. I want nothing else than to know that I am doing what I feel I am led to do by You. I know you have a purpose of making plans for me to stay home, and I am okay with that. Even if you don’t have a precise plan for me in the next couple of days, let me find You and rest in what I find to do. Love You Abba!

Wednesday, February 20, 2008

Pieces

Here is another one that hits me hard! I see how incredibly strong these words mean when they are put together in this format. I am learning through this and I see Father in this. What do you see?

"Pieces" by Red

I'm here again
A thousand miles away from you
A broken mess, just scattered pieces of who I am
I tried so hard
Thought I could do this on my own
I've lost so much along the way

Then I'll see your face
I know I'm finally yours
I find everything I thought I lost before
You call my name
I come to you in pieces
So you can make me whole

I've come undone
But you make sense of who I am
Like puzzle pieces in your eye

Then I'll see your face
I know I'm finally yours
I find everything I thought I lost before
You call my name
I come to you in pieces
So you can make me whole!

I tried so hard! So hard!
I tried so hard!

Then I'll see your face
I know I'm finally yours
I find everything I thought I lost before
You call my name
I come to you in pieces
So you can make me whole
So you can make me whole

Lost In You

Just recently I discovered a new Christian band called, Red. They have amazing music and their lyrics go deep into my spirit! I have clenched onto them and am finding great things through their music that Father is using in my life these past couple of days!!! Here are the lyrics to one of their amazing songs, LOST!!


"Lost"

Can I be dreaming once again?
I'm reaching helpless I descend
You lead me deeper through this maze
I'm not afraid

I'm lost in you everywhere I run
Everywhere I turn I'm finding something new
Lost in you, something I can't fight
I cannot escape
I could spend my life lost in you! Lost in you!

Your whispers fill these empty halls
I'm searching for you as you call
I'm racing, chasing after you
I need you more

I'm lost in you everywhere I run
Everywhere I turn I'm finding something new
Lost in you, something I can't fight
I cannot escape
I could spend my life lost in you!

I could never be the same
Something that I could never arise
I could never look away
I lost myself in you!
It's all over now!

Lost in you! Everywhere I run
Lost in you! Everywhere I run!
Lost in you!
Lost in you!

Monday, February 18, 2008

Can I still live in the Status Quo?

I am a woman who loves the Lord and is becoming relaxed and comfortable with who I am in my journey with Father, I have come to understand the importance of living in a relationship with God and getting my focus on my heart more than my outward appearance of how I look as a Christian to others. Don’t get me wrong, I want to show others Father through the way I live my life, but as far as how others see me, regardless, I want the freedom to do what I feel I can do without judgments from others, especially if I am not getting conviction from Father. I am literally crawling out of my shell on this one, so ‘PLEASE’ bear with me.

There are choices that I make that put Christians on edge. They may look at me and say, that chic is not a Christian, she doesn’t go to church, and she goes places ‘I’ would never enter. She listens to secular music. She drinks alcohol on occasion, and go on and on and on. They make these judgments without ever knowing who I really am inside my heart. Now I could see where they are coming from, for I have been there before. I used to look at people from that angle if I found out that they partied, or they listened to secular music, or so on if they professed to be a Christian, but then I realized something. Its not what one does that clearly defines them, but it is the heart that defines them. Now I can see how contradictable that sounds, but if one focuses on what the person is ‘doing’ than on the ‘person’, it is easy to overlook what is simply important. Their heart and whom they really are inside. I may know a person my whole life and really never ‘know’ them because they aren’t willing to expose their heart to me, but only know them for what they do. How then can I make judgments on what I can see, and expect to make a 'good' judgment and never really know who they are.

It's not my place to judge 'regardless'...


Okay, I may be skating on thin ice here, but I have been thinking about this lately, and need some input.

Please be real with me!
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