Friday, May 22, 2009
We just got to Springfield today for the wedding we are attending on Saturday. Looking back at the last couple of days we spend in St. Louis has been life transforming. Father has opened the door for us to meet with Kent and his family during our travels. It has truly been a mind and heart awakening for me. Mainly because talking with fellow travelers who are captivated by the power of Father's deep and compassionate love and the freedom that is found in Him has truly helped the transformational process in my life due to how contagious this way of living is, and I mean that in the BEST way ever possible. When it comes to freedom, I have seen it, but only at certain times in my own life, and never have I truly experienced or have seen it talked out or literally lived out until now! The way we talked about it when we were visiting has really helped me see things differently in the light of freedom. Have you ever felt so connected spiritually with someone that you almost feel like the connection has been purposely placed in your life that has brought out the transformation? This transformation I am talking about is strictly about giving up power and control in relationships and diving into the process in which we decide to relinquish control and allow uncertainty to take place in which to find ultimate freedom and get prosperous outcomes with whoever is involved! I actually got to experience this first hand while visiting Kent and the family. The thing that got my core attention was how real and honest they were even with us there. Nothing changed when we were there, and we were able to see these dynamics firsthand. The realness that Kent and Julie shared has taught me to even be more real and transparent with others than ever before. I don’t think I have ever had a problem with being real with people especially in the last couple of years, but, there is something completely different when it comes to experiencing it in reality, like right in front of others. If I could only truly experience that without the fear of what others may think would be the 1st step in freedom I believe. The real and necessary family life stuff I have been able to experience has truly changed my way of thinking on so many levels in regards to relationships in general. During our visit, I remember Kent said something that I will never forget and that I believe wholeheartedly. He said something like, relationships are the hardest dynamic ever created, but it is usually the humans that make them difficult than anything else. This is so true because it is self that makes them so messy; the one who mostly strives to live for himself and does not sacrifice himself in the light of freedom or love for another. Today, this has been on my mind and I truly believe that another process of transformation is on the verge of happening. Uncertainty is scary when it is looked at without the lens of freedom from needing to be in control of situations and outcomes of circumstances. Usually in the midst of trying to be in control of situations, we more than likely will try to defile those who stand in the way of what we want. This is just one piece of the puzzle when it comes to relationships and I feel I am but touching the surface of what my heart is yet to understand, but with Father’s wisdom and grace, He will make a way for it to lead me and guide me closer to where He is. That is the whole point of living anyway… More to come later!!! I will be in Springfield until Sunday, and I hope to have more time to write in the near future.
Posted by Nicole at 12:17 AM