Okay here goes! I am not going to be walking on egg shells here, because I just have to get some questions out of my head so that I can hopefully focus on what is more important, to love! I have been constantly mindfully preoccupied by all these questions, and I am going to just get them down, and if you want, take a stab and them. Any comments are welcome and are wanted to help me sort some things out…. Ohh, and please bare with me, I am going through a process of re-developing… I really want to be found with grace on my lips and love in my heart for all people, including those I question! I am in no way trying to defile or point the figure at any one person or people, I too have been there and find myself revisiting places in which I used to find myself; but by help from God, I am no longer captive from that which used to hold me down… Amen!
Who was Paul? Was he the leader of the apostles? Or was he just a man. Was he better than all the rest of the men in his day? Was it because of his great transformation and ‘testimony’ that he lived through that makes him so special? I don’t want to be disrespectful, but, it seems out of the entire bible and people in this day and age always have held him in HIGH esteem almost seems to be up there with Jesus.
Doesn’t it seem odd that people who have ‘testimonies’ seem to be put up on pedestals? Like they have a story to tell like Paul did, and the rest who are just normal Christian folk who don’t have a ‘testimony’ that has rocked their faith, don’t seem to get noticed. At least this is seen frequently in the IC, but this kind of stuff I have always questioned and have had problems with. When a friend was telling me about her ‘testimony’ it was like she was proud of her wrong doing just because she now had a story to tell. It is quite weird.
Why does it seem like people who think they understand grace, the meaning and the good news of the gospel, but yet live as though they live by law? Here is something I found from Rich, on his blog! (Hope you don’t mind), it fits in here perfectly! “Performance (law) based living does what it does best, filling our inner being with something we were never designed for, angst, fear, anxiety, self-analysis, comparing and competing with the constant shifting and changing of the rules by the rule making gurus.” I just can’t understand why we preach with graced filled words, but it seems that we turn our backs on it, by living in accordance to human made laws and rules. I sense that I do this on occasion, and I am in no way pointing the figure and anyone in particular, but it never ceases to amaze me how much this happens!
Why is it that there are so many people who interpret scripture differently? This I believe is the #1 problem that arises in Christian relating. People who interpret things a certain way will always think that they are right, regardless of what the other person thinks. This reminds me of a conversation I was having with Kent, and he said a long time ago he and Julie went to a Marriage class or something , and the person who was leading their session, put a mug in the center of the table as him and his wife were sitting face to face away from each other, and they were asked to give their perception of what they viewed on the mug, one said that they saw a picture of a rose or flower, and the other said that they didn’t see anything, but from their point of view, the mug was blank. I thought what Kent shared with me was fascinating because we all have different perceptions of things and may never see eye to eye on everything. It was a great analogy of how different we are all, even if we believe in the same God. At least we have that in common, but it seems that the problem lies in and among the fine print of what we believe. I never really understood why it was important to be right, or to debate our doctrine’s, dogma, agenda’s, things that have to do with Father! Where is the love in that?
Is it our ‘Christian’ right to point out evil in people’s lives, even those who proclaim to be righteous? I know there are scriptures that talks about the process in which we go to our brother to confront his sin, and that seems to be the rhetoric of how things are done in the IC these days, but, hasn’t that seem to be overplayed by many who think it is their job to convict people of their wrong doing? I thought that was the Holy Spirit’s job? I think there are ways to go about doing this that are not as harsh or as negative, but correcting anyone to me seems like it wouldn’t be my place to do, to anyone, believers or not. Maybe I just hate correction so that is why I asked… God help me with this one!
Why do our motives and biases more often than not reflect on ourselves more than on God? Is this the fruit of our selfish tendencies? To proclaim who we support and what we like based on who we are? Is this really selfishness? Man, I bet that one was confusing! Sorry!
Not all who wander are aimless, especially those who seek truth beyond tradition, beyond definition, beyond image. -- Mona Lisa Smile
Hi! Thanks for coming by and checking out my blog. If I had to tell you anything about myself and why I write, it would be this...
I love to write about things that inspire me or captures my attention, or merely what is happening in my life. I don't proclaim to have it all figured out, but I do know this, that I am simply human that has problems and I am not afraid to expose them here. Vulnerability and being authentic is something I strive for, even if it looks ugly at times.
So please feel free to come and have a conversation with me. I can't wait to dig in deep with you!
I am learning how to live loved by God and embrace His grace that will help me fly in freedom. Let the wings of grace take me, all of me, for who I am and not for who I should be.