Sometimes I struggle with making the choice to forgive those who have hurt me, and have taken life from me. I have been dealing with these thoughts of forgiveness plus the stirring of the flesh that wants to build up bitterness and rage at the same time. Oh how I wish it was easier to be more like Father. I have that desire to become much more like Him than I am. I want so bad to let go of all the desires of the flesh and walk away from my pride and take hold of unconditional love and acceptance for those who don’t accept me or love me back. If I could just set all of the negatives aside, and hurtful gesture that were thrown at me and look past into the heart who may be crying out for just that; Unconditional love that Father so gracefully portrays to each and every one of us regardless of our sin. When I think of complete and pure forgiveness, I think of Jesus at the cross, when He was beaten and hung on the cross to die. He died for those who beat Him and nailed Him to the cross; if only they would come to Him, he would wipe their slate clean. If only they could see the love He had for them. In my latest blog post I posed a question about forgiveness. I asked how someone could forgive another if they haven’t asked for forgiveness or even if they think they didn’t do anything wrong. I think if Jesus had the will to forgive, than somewhere in my heart, deep down in a little corner, I do too. Even if it isn’t much of a will, it is something that can grow into great forgiveness. Jesus said, "Father, forgive them, for they do not know what they are doing." I need to give my friend that forgiveness and love even if she doesn’t deserve it. I am not going to deny that this is very hard to do, and requires a lot of God in me to be able to love and forgive this much. The past couple of weeks through what happened are I believe a Transformation of my heart because I am willing to make that choice to forgive her and love her. Even if I have to make that choice every day, I am willing.
Father, only you can give me the strength to love like you love, and to forgive like you forgive. I want to be like you Father, continue to give me that will to be more like you! I love you Abba!