Expectations can be somewhat destructive when it comes to relationships! Its like someone who puts their own personal theories on another and ‘expects’ them to follow through on what is ‘expected’ of them from that person. Expectations can vary from small little demeaning things, to things that are huge and could be life changing! But yet, if relationships didn’t have any expectations, any boundaries, wouldn’t that be more like the recipe for disaster? I guess it just depends on the certain kind of ‘relationship’. For instance, a marriage has expectations, and everybody knows it’s not okay to go and sleep with another, or play around like you’re NOT married! However, I am starting to think that maybe friendships don't work that way and are hindered when they are put to the ‘expectations test’, the thing that can commonly destroy and relinquish pain and bitterness upon the other party who is causing this to occur. At times I have come to realize that I too have expected things from girlfriends that were too high to match or meet up to. I now realize with the expectation I put on someone else to measure is unbelievably wrong and simply not what I see Father doing to me in my relationship with him. I see this drawn out to the point that some will give ultimatums if they don’t fallow through on what is expected. How amazingly awful that is and manipulative. Can’t we see how destructive this pattern is when we expect others to ‘do’ something? Wow, but now I have started to set those expectations where they belong; not in my life. If I don’t want others to ‘expect’ things from me, I don’t need to start setting expectations for others.
I used to carry the weight of religion. Now I am learning how to let the weight fall, spreading my wings to fly away from the bounds that limit and keep me from experiencing true freedom. GRACE!