Intensive Longing

Pain and love have something extremely in common. They both deal with immense passion. They express longing for who is and who was. This expresses something that deeply identifies passion, an intensive longing for one who is in love and one who is mourning over one that was loved or who was loved in return. This demonstrates intense connections between two beings. Something that can never be understood for something any different than what this represents. It is a longing and expressive passion both in long sufferings and ongoing love that hinder to only those who are involved. I wonder at times if Father could feel so much longing, something so deep and intense that his entire being is wrapped up in longing for who we are to just love him back.

I am reminded when my dad died. He was someone who held a great part of my heart, as a little girl, my only hope was to know how much he loved me, and to express to him that he was someone I looked up to; but to feel like I lost that was a suffering I only grew to understand. Though, it only added to my life in immeasurable ways and I can only know now by how my Heavenly Father has loved me even when I felt I have fallen short or not have come to a perfect place for him to love me completely. However, he still does, he still happens to love me in complete and unconditional ways that can only be experienced to really and truly understand the meaning of this kind of love. Through times of deep mourning and deep passion that I experienced, I grew to understand that my heavenly Father loves me and immeasurably cares for me as my earthly Father did even in the loss that I feel. The loving and overwhelming graceful expression I remember seeing on my dad’s face is something I now see every day from my Heavenly Father.

Oh how deep the pain goes in the sight of loss and intense longing, but just as deep does the love my Father has for me that flows even more profoundly. It reaches where nothing else can. The only difference between loss and having is the present and past connections that exist. I no longer have a physical connection with my earthly daddy, but what I will never lose is a connection that I have with my heavenly Daddy who loves me and that will never cease to exist.

Going Down In Flames

Christians-- we're all afraid of fire.
We prefer to suck on pacifiers. Baby pacifists, we're throwing fits.
We don't shake hands, we shake our fists.We're cannibals.
We watch our brothers fall. We eat our own, the bones and all.
Finally fell asleep on the plane to wake to see we're going down in flames.
We're going down, down, down in flames. We're gonna drown, drown, drown insane.
We see the problem and the risk, but nothing's solved. We just say, Tisk, tisk, tisk, and, Shame, shame, shame. Finally fell asleep on the plane to wake to see we're going down in flames. Let's go!Christians-- we mourn, the thorn is stuck in the side of the body watch it self-destruct. The enemy is much ignored when we fight this Christian civil war. We're cannibals. We watch our brothers fall. We eat our own, the bones and all.Finally fell asleep on the plane to wake to see we're going down in flames.We're going down, down, down in flames. We're gonna drown, drown, drown insane. We see the problem and the risk, but nothing's solved.We just say, Tisk, tisk, tisk, and, Shame, shame, shame. Finally fell asleep on the plane to wake to see we're going down in flames.

Na na na na, na na na na.
Na na na na, na na na na.
Na na na na, na na na na.
Na na na na, na na na na.
Na na na na, na na na na.
Na na na na, na na na na.
Na na na na, na na na na.
Bana na na na, na na na

Let me pause to clarify ('cause I'm sure you're asking, Why?).
I stand before you and proudly claim to belong to what this song complains.
I'm part of the problem, I confess, but I gotta get this off my chest.
Let's extinguish the anguish for which we're to blame, and save the world from going down in flames. Let me pause to clarify ('cause I'm sure you're asking, Why?).
I stand before you and proudly claim to belong to what this song complains.
I'm part of the problem, I confess, But I gotta get this off my chest.
Let's extinguish the anguish for which we're to blame, and save the world from going down in flames.

Relient K, Going Down In Flames

Who Are We Kidding?

I have become dumbfounded by some statistics that are popping up about what I would call a misinterpretation of truth that modern Christianity has presented to the world. The number of church attendance has dropped tremendously in the past five years, and the way Christianity is seen by others is something we would be incredibly stupid if we ignore these facts and go on our merry little ways. The majority, meaning more than half Americans have a bad taste in their mouths about Christianity and Christ himself because of how Christians have represented Him. We have become so incompatible from God that the way we Christians live are opposite from how Jesus lived and represented His Father. We are only kidding ourselves if we think the majority of Christians are making any difference in this world. Here are unbelievers perceptions of who we are as Christians…

Hypocritical
Perception: Christians say one thing, but live something entirely different.

Get Saved
Perception: Christians are insincere and concerned only with converting others.

Anti Homosexual
Perception: Christians show contempt for gays and lesbians.

Sheltered
Perception: Christians are boring, unintelligent, old-fashioned, and out of touch with reality.

Too Political
Perception: Christians are primarily motivated by a political agenda and promote right-wing politics

Judgmental
Perception: Christians are prideful and quick to find faults in others.

I would have to say if these perceptions are true of us, then I think we need to WAKE UP to reality and start living as Christ would and stop making a bad name for Him. Wouldn’t it be nice if we could all be known for our relationship with Father and the LOVE we have for one another and every single person than by these perceptions?

Non-Hypocritical
New Perception: Christians are transparent about their flaws and act first, talk second.

Cultivate love and relationships
New Perception: Christians cultivate relationships and environments where others can be deeply transformed by God.

Love Homosexuals
New Perception: Christians show compassion and love to all people, regardless of their lifestyle.

Not Sheltered
New Perception: Christians are engaged, informed, and offer sophisticated responses to the issues people face.

Respecting Any Political View
New Perception: Christians are characterized by respecting people, thinking biblical, and finding solutions to complex issues.

Non-Judgmental
New Perception: Christians show grace by finding the good in others and seeing their potential in being Christ followers


What is it going to take to turn things around? A lot of re-thinking is necessary in order to move forward from the names the world has given us. We were created in God’s image, and are to be known for the love we have for one another…

Let’s do it together… Who’s with me?

To read more statistics and learn more about these perceptions, go to: http://www.unchristian.com/book.asp

A Tangible God

I think it’s hard to understand how tangible God is, because it’s hard to imagine being close to a spiritual being for a lot of people. The term Christian or Christianity has become more strictly about what we can ‘see’ and ‘do’ and not really about having a spiritual connection with a God who is inter-connected to us in the spiritual sense. Going to a church building and ‘doing’ certain things is something that is touchable. We can easily do things for God, or understand things about God but not really see how we can be connected with him because it seems that the spiritual side of Christianity seems to be hard to wrap our minds around. When I talk about God to someone I always say I have a personal relationship with Him, however, I think that is like telling someone that you have been to space and actually got to see the earth revolve around the sun; It’s really hard to imagine how that is possible because of the personal experience that it gives seems so foreign for a lot of folks. I even think that some people’s perception of God can also keep them away from having a real tangible relationship with him. If someone thinks God is to be feared, than that fear can keep them away from God. Why would anyone want to be close to a God who is angry or waiting to punish you once you blow it? I totally wouldn’t want to be close to a God like that. Perceptions of how we think about God really play a huge role in how close we allow ourselves to really be with him. How do we break down this mind barrier that keeps us spiritually distant from really knowing who God is personally? Doing things for God and understand who God is, from what the bible says doesn’t cut it for me. It simply just brushes on the surface of who God is to you personally. I want more than that, much more because I have experienced a sense of spiritual connections with Father that I cannot simply explain in words… I think what individuals experience is something that they can’t simply explain, but the experience in us speaks for itself. What I mean is this. We were created in His image, and when we are inter-connected with him, our life can’t express anything else but who he is to others through us. I find this to be a remarkable sense of reality in my life. I know I am not perfect or even come close, but this kind of living is not about being perfect or a competition of who is closer to Father. It’s about authenticity with our Father and experiencing this is like capturing a breathtaking sunset for the first time, though there is no comparison to the realness that is experienced. I think even on this earth we aren’t even coming close to the more real experience that awaits us when we are face to face with Father.

If Fear Didn't Have a Place

If fear didn't have a place, would anything be possible? I tend to think it would. I think fear really dampens our hopes and dreams, or even others who want to experience life with us. Can you imagine a place in time where nothing stood in our way to experience things in this world? Something that would bring out extreme freedom that we have never experienced before. I tend to think that we allow circumstances in this life to determine what we are okay with and what we will put ourselves up too. For instance, I am not a huge out doors person or a risk taker, but I think the reason that is, is because I am afraid of the possibility of things going wrong before they even happen. I set myself up for failure or carry fear that hinders the fun or experience all together. I would do anything to overcome this... I am not afraid to admit this, because it has really hindered many things in my life, and definitely has hindered the adventure side. I am beginning to be okay with not being good at things such as skiing, but I take it so seriously that when I fall, I feel like I have failed. It saddens me that I just can't have fun even if I suck at it! Does anyone have any thoughts that could encourage me? I feel like I am not cut out for things, and I give myself a hard time when I fail or not follow through on things I set out to do... Fear really sucks!

I want to be set free, nothing can hold me back now!
If only it was easier done as it is said.

Broken Church

Why do Christians seem so fake and superficial? In the organized religious systems, you go and pretend to have no problems and this creates a facade that hides real issues and problems that people actually have. In order to fit the Christian mold we have to hide our problems and struggles and put on the mask of a good perfect Christian. Why can’t we all come to grips that we ALL have problems and that NO one is perfect no matter how hard they try? The religious establishments are built up in this way that, one can’t go and show that they have problems or even seek true help, unless you admit your sins to a pastor and then to God so that you are free from it and can move on, but that just doesn’t fix the problems! I think it just shoves the issues inside of us and we are to never bring it up or show it again. I am so saddened how Christianity is seen for the mask that it wears and not who they really are or what they are going through with Father. It has come to the point that some even feel condemned before they even know who God truly is. I really feel like this kind of Christian behavior is not how God would treat anyone; rather, he would reach out to the hurting, and comfort the sick and shower each one with compassion. How have we gone so far to treat those in need the exact opposite? Sure, we can be nice to those who are in need, but it seems like its coming from a distance and fake place and it seems like we never get down to where people are really hurting and extending our love and support with no strings attached like Father did. We are all broken in one way or another and if we don’t start to realize that we all are sinners and have problems (that includes every pastor, every church leader every person with the title Christian), then we will never truly understand what Father really meant when he said, LOVE YOUR NEIGHBOR AS YOURSELF… Let’s jump off our high horses and start making a difference in each others lives and truly come to grips with our own brokenness.

God? Can You Hear Me Now?

Today I went to work leaving my cell-phone at home. It was tragic! I never leave my phone at home when I leave… but when this happens, I feel naked, or something. I found myself dreading the thought that I actually forgot my phone, it felt like something huge was missing, and I think I am beginning to realize that I am more dependent on it than on anything else. It’s weird how easy it is to rely on a phone because I am constantly thinking that I need to either call someone or someone is trying to call me and I have to be available if that happens. I think maybe the reason why I forgot it today was because maybe God was like, “why don’t you talk to me, I’m right here, you don’t need to dial a number to reach me, I am right here waiting.” Don’t get me wrong, I think cell-phones are a HUGE blessing and I am so privileged to be able and dial anyone up anywhere, at anytime and that is a very good thing, unless this dependency becomes more important than on our dependency we have on Father, because it is so easy to call up a friend and say I have an issues and I need to talk about this, instead of first calling on Father instead. I absolutely believe Father has put people in our lives to share things with, but, if that become more important than talking to him than that can become a problem. Maybe God wanted me to forget my phone today because He knew how much I really needed to talk to him. I really do think God wanted me to forget my phone because maybe he thought, “well, if Nicole leaves her phone at home today, then that will give her a chance to actually talk to me.” Relying on my phone as the main source of communication to the outside world is fine and I don’t have a problem with it, but depending on Father and the open communication we have between us has taken me places I can only imagine going! This journey with Father only happens if I truly depend on him to guide me and help me along the way!

Escape From Churchianity

This is such a great article and I just had to share!!! It would be nice to hear some feedback!!!

Enjoy!

http://www.batteredsheep.com/escape.html


In Freedom, Nicole!

unChristian - Perceptions Introduction Video

Is this what the world really see's when they think about Christians and Christianity? I think this is sad, but true in a lot of ways, and I can totally see a lot of Christians in the same light! Christians have really misrepresented God on so many levels, its scary!

Erasing Blog Posts Before They Are Written

Every time I usually think about a blog post, I am doing something away from my computer so that in order for me to ever write about what I am thinking about, I am dependent on my memory, and unfortunately, it fails more often times than not. I do a lot of thinking throughout the day and my busy mind gets wrapped up in other thoughts that relate to other things and these thought-patterns are known for their erasers. I always think, man, what was that blog post I was just thinking about, it would have been a good topic for discussion, and then, it’s gone. I would love to create a habit where I could always wear a piece of paper and a pen up my sleeve so when I come up with these brilliant blog post ideas, I could then write my ideas down and later when I get to my computer, I could write them. Oh, but wouldn’t that be too difficult!? Yeah, probably, but if I didn’t do this, then I wouldn’t have a list of awesome blog post entries that are just waiting to be written!

Does anyone have good ideas as to how to remember things such as blog post entries?