Why do I feel like I have to give an explanation to everyone about how I live my life and what exactly I do? I feel like this pressure to do so is coming from me and not anyone else. Letting the skeleton out of the closet is hard, I guess I feel like it keeps me grounded and real about how I present myself to others, even though no one is demanding or even wanting an explanation of what I do.
1 Corinthians 6:12
Everything is permissible for me but not everything is beneficial. Everything is permissible for me but I will not be mastered by anything.
I love this scripture because it points to several important facts; whatever I do does not make me, it is not a part of who I am. Just like a job or a career. I will not take my job with me when I die, nor will I take what I do here on earth with me either. Also, it will not overtake or master me. Now, I have done some pretty dumb things in my life as I am sure pretty much everyone has, but I don’t think that what we do will surpass who we are or become who we are. I remember when I was a nanny, Emma and I would drive past a prison on our way to this children's art studio, and almost every time we would pass the prison she would say, ‘bad people live there’. I would tell her that I believe that the person isn’t bad but their choices that they have made were bad and now they have to pay the consequences and go to ‘time out’ for a long time sometimes, but that doesn’t mean that the person themselves are exactly bad, but what they choose to do. Why do people focus on what other people do instead of on their hearts and other good upright things they do? Why does it seem like evil always has a spotlight on it and we never get to see the good people do? It’s like the news stations. The news media always puts a spotlight on the bad in the world, such as, the crisis of the economy, the hurricanes, destruction, death, and evil people do. The old saying goes, ‘good news isn’t news’. That’s how most of us were trained to observe the human race; we put people into categories and put labels on them based on what they ‘do’ even when we don’t know them.
Prison Diary: A Magical Night
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